By: Keturah Platt, PhD
I can remember vividly a phone conversation that I had with my mother during my first year in graduate school. It was a typical day where I was venting to her about the amount of stress that I was feeling being in a clinical psychology doctoral program. I expressed that I felt like I was on a horse that was galloping out of control and I couldn’t quite gain control over the horse by pulling on its reins. From classes, meeting with clients, and other day-to-day responsibilities, it felt overwhelming to juggle all of the demands while also honoring my personal needs.
I often think about Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, a motivational theory in psychology comprising a five-tier model of human needs. It is depicted as hierarchical levels within a pyramid. The lower-level refers to our physiological needs for survival (e.g., food, water, air, sleep). Once that level is fulfilled, we seek to satisfy a higher set of needs that are more complex (e.g., safety, social belonging, self-esteem, and self-actualization).
From graduate school requirements to other life demands, it seemed that I was going through the motions of what was expected of me and it felt like I was running on fumes. From inadequate sleep to rarely going outside to get a breath of fresh air, I started to realize later that these physical needs were essential for me to function optimally as a human being. I needed to gain more control over my bolting horse, which represented an accumulation of stressors that seemed to be going at a high speed. Sometimes, it can be difficult to slow down in our fast-paced world, but taking time to slow down and rest is necessary.
In the Book of Mark, Jesus called His disciples to step aside from their mission and ministry to rest for a while. “Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not even have a chance to eat, he said to them, ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest’” (Mark 6:31). When reflecting on this scripture, it became clear to me that when living life on autopilot, we can tend to neglect our body’s basic needs to function. Jesus knew and urged His disciples to take a moment to simply be still and rest from their life of service. We are called to rest so we can be restored.
Although I am an ongoing work in progress when it comes to self-care, I am much more intentional about recognizing areas of my life that need more attention. Self-care needs can vary depending on the day and/or week, but it is about taking action to nurture our overall well-being. Personally, I engage in daily prayer to care for myself spiritually. I have also noticed that I am much more intentional about getting adequate sleep and taking more brain breaks to move and spend time in nature. Taking inventory of our needs and starting with the basics can make a world of a difference in how we show up in our various life roles. In the midst of stress and feeling overwhelmed with the busyness of life, I encourage all of us to continuously reflect on our personal needs that could benefit from additional tender love and care.
